Tara had a date the other night, and I said to her, “Should I send you possible topics of conversation all night just in case there’s a lull?” to which she said, “Do it.”
Tonight started off simply.
Tara: I just saw what you reblogged on tumblr.
Tara: “I think you can tell a lot about a person by which death in Harry Potter hurt them the most.”
Tara: So which Harry Potter death hurt you the most
Elodie: Siruis. You?
Tara: Sirius, and also Fred.
Elodie: That really is a great question.
Tara: It is. I’m going to ask everyone I know that question now.
Elodie: Hahaha you should
Trust me when I say that it started off as a halfhearted suggestion. A joke, if you will. A joke that mushroomed into something more. The next two hours were frantic, to say the least, as we each texted and/or Facebook messaged at least fifteen people.
Elodie: I just asked Ace, he says Dobby.
Tara: Melissa says Fred.
Elodie: I’m going to ask Liam.
Tara: My roommate said Fred also.
Elodie: Liam says Dobby.
Elodie: Then he said “HOLLAH,” so I think that conversation is over.
Tara: You can’t really go anywhere from there.
Elodie: Carmen says Sirius too.
Elodie: I’m going to ask Calvin, and here’s how I’m going to phrase it: “You’re the worst texter ever but I have a question and it is URGENT.”
Elodie: I mean, you’d answer that right?
Tara: I would.
Elodie: Why aren’t people getting back to me faster? It’s 9 p.m. on a Friday night, what the hell could they be doing.
Tara: Who the hell has plans on Friday night
Elodie: Freaks, that’s who.
Tara: And we pride ourselves on being completely normal.
Tara: Even my mom isn’t answering me.
Elodie: Shit Calvin texted me back. I didn’t think that would actually work. Now he’s probably expecting an actual serious question like “HOW DO YOU PERFORM A TRACHEOTOMY THIS IS QUITE SERIOUS.”
Tara: Though texting him that mid-emergency would be kind of a long shot. Valerie says Sirius.
Tara: AND SO DOES MY MOM. YES.
Elodie: I should ask my mom. Although she’s only read up to Goblet of Fire.
Tara: All she could really say is Cedric then.
Elodie: UM EXCUSE ME
Elodie: I THINK YOU’RE FORGETTING SOME CRUCIAL CHARACTERS
Elodie: Quirrell. Two unnamed unicorns. The Serpent of Slytherin.
Tara: I apologize.
Elodie: Oh my God my mom just asked what I was doing, and I said, “Texting people about Harry Potter, it got out of hand,” and then I explained, and she said, “For me it was Sirius and Dumbledore.” And I was like, “Mom, you haven’t read those books, and I’m 80% sure you haven’t seen the movies, how could you possibly know that?”
Elodie: And here’s what she says: “I’m not sure. I just know.”
Tara: SHE KNOWS WHAT’S UP
Elodie: Kathryn says Dobby.
Elodie: Calvin says Dumbledore.
Tara: …Should we be keeping like a running tally?
Elodie: That would’ve been a good idea.
This conversation went on for a really, really long time. Ultimately, however, most people said Sirius, or Dobby. No one said the Serpent of Slytherin. What say you?