I went to the Starkid concert last night, and it was EVERYTHING I WANTED IT TO BE AND MORE. I don’t want to spoil it for anyone who’s going, so let’s cut to the end. Tara and I were waiting in line to get these bracelets that also functioned as USB drives and purportedly had “surprises” on them. You should know that this was the most haphazard, ill-conceived line in the history of lines.
“I’m going to have a coughing fit in T-minus twenty seconds,” I said. “Start throwing around words like ‘highly contagious’ and ‘pulmonary tuberculosis’ and we’ll see who moves out of the way.”
When it comes to waiting in line, I would rather swallow fire than cut in front of somebody. This disorderly mass of crazed, sweaty fans, however, was not what I considered a line. I considered this a crowd. And when it comes to crowds, I am a pusher. You should see me on Black Friday; I’m like a caffeine-riddled bulldozer. So believe me when I saw I bulldozed my way through that crowd like I was trying to get the last helicopter out of Vietnam. But it was like charging into a brick wall. We wound up waiting for a little over an hour, and once we got up there we decided we did not want the USB drives after all. We got posters instead, and I got a Starkid button that I brought back to my dorm and proceeded to lose immediately.
Nonetheless, it was AWESOME.