Dear Sparklers, Manklers, and readers of this blog,

This is a crisis situation. I’m at my grandparents’ cottage, and there is no food. There’s, like, low-fat soy milk, and there are strange wafers, and there are hot dog buns but no hot dogs. Also, there’s spotty cell reception. I actually have to hold my phone outside a certain second-story window, and then blindly hit the SEND button, and pray that it works. My Internet connection is on the fritz, so I hope it holds out long enough for me to post this. I’m being eaten alive by bugs. I have a mosquito bite that I’ve “itched” (read: sort of, kind of scratched around the actual bite) to a gangrenous state.

The situation is dire. Send help. Send a care package. Send bug spray. Send a cell phone tower.

EDIT: My grandmother just asked, “So do you think this Justin Bieber person is sexy?”


2 thoughts on “SOS

  1. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA XD Oh my, did she really? 🙂 That is so funny!! Ahh, you made my day.

    But you gotta admit, JB is just a tad bit GORG (only with that haircut, though).

    • I’ve got to admit, any guy who can actually sell his hair on Ebay knows his way to my heart. I mean, that’s just good business.

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